What do you think? I think this is true.
In my experience, most writers are an odd bunch. And that’s the way we like it.
I’m finally feeling the writing bug again. It’s been a long time, far too long. I’ve spent too much time trying to figure out what to do with the blog. How should I organize it? What should I post where? Is that the font I want? Are these colors working? Should my content have a different flow? Do I want this part to be public?
It’s no wonder how I get so overwhelmed when I put so much pressure on myself. So what if sometimes this will read like a whiney, ‘dear diary’ monologue? There’s a freedom to public journaling that, while terrifying at times, is more often a welcome release. I need to let things go and start fresh with this thing. Or something like that.
I’m too anxious. I’m highly emotional. I’m overly practical. I beat myself up too often about my all too human faults.
I’m also witty and sarcastic. I can make most people laugh with my demeanor. I smile easily. I’m a curious, knowledge hungry, daydreamer. I’m all too human and that’s not all too bad.
There’s a point in here somewhere. I can’t promise you that I’m going to be consistent or reliable. I need these pages though. For some reason I keep coming back here because it feels like the right outlet.
I’ll be back soon. Hopefully I’ll have some daydreams to share.
I’ve not abandoned this blog! I’m just having issues with it and can’t unscramble myself enough to figure anything out right now.
Thanks for sticking around.
I took a hiatus from the blogging world. I do that a lot. This time had a purpose though. I have been thinking about what I want to post here and what I hope to accomplish (if anything) by posting. Eventually, I plan on giving this sweet little page an overhaul. I’ll give it a new look, a newer (more organized) setting, etc.
I’m still working on it. I’m still alive and I thought you all should know. The writing well is currently dry.
See you again soon!
[The title: Margaret Atwood said that. :) ]
Do you ever get in the mood to write and then find yourself thinking about and discussing the act of writing more than actually writing? I bounce around and hype myself up, read wise words from other writers, and pin to my writing board on Pinterest for inspiration. All the while I’m doing the one thing that all writers seem to have mastered: avoidance. Sometimes I think part of calling yourself a writer is the active non-writing we tend to do. When I get a really good idea (by really good, I mean it excites and intrigues me) I will fast-write it out and look upon the five or ten pages of ecstatic notes and scribbles with pride. I can’t wait to plot this out some more, I tell myself. Then I put it away in my trusty writing folder, where it will be safe.
Wow, this is a great idea! Why haven’t I touched it in two years? Good thing it’s always in the same place so I can come back to it later. This writing folder is awesome.
Oh my, I forgot about this story idea entirely. I wonder why I never followed through with it? I’ll put it here in the front of the folder so that I can work on it soon.
This character is so fantastic. I know that I won’t waste these four pages (front and back!) of character-building. I wouldn’t want to have several pages of raw character material and no story to place them in. That would be silly! Right?!
Do you see a pattern here? I’ve come to the conclusion that I do not trust myself to finish tasks in my writing. I’m afraid to muck up the whole thing. This, of course, is absurd. What writer doesn’t completely obliterate an idea from time to time? Well, that’s simple: the kind of writer that does not write. The answer to that kind of blew my mind. It is still kind of blowing my mind. My mind is akin to a windswept beach where all the trees lean inland due to the constant berating of the wind coming off the water. Where swirls of little sandy tornadoes that only hold the tiny grains for brief moments of glory, constantly come to life and die upon the shore. This is what I imagine when someone utters the phrase ‘mind blown’, maybe I take metaphors too far.
The solution to this issue is so simple but requires commitment. If I want to to write…I should just write! I should make time. I say it so often it’s almost a reflex when someone asks if I’m working on anything. “Oh you know, when I have the time.” Guess what? I have the time. I do not utilize this time sufficiently. At all. Time. Oh, glorious time. We have it, it has us, until all of the sudden we are no more. Time will continue but we are only here for a brief breath. We all want to do things with that breath. I want to write about it.
I’m in a mood tonight. To be honest, that’s descriptive of me more often than not on most nights. “She’s in a mood again.” I’ll equate it to a writer’s tendency; I’ll say it’s just a quirk.
I think about life frequently. I think about love and how wonderful it is that we are capable of such a thing that it’s almost too much to describe. We sure try to describe it. We create vast depictions of it. We sensualize it. We wrap ourselves in it and forget about reality. We allow ourselves to succumb to fantasy. We love haphazardly. Sometimes we abandon all logic to chase it.
Why? I’ve heard other people ask this question about love and it always causes me to take pause. If ever we were to have a purpose, if ever we were to discover a vein of solid proof as to why we exist, I know that love would be interwoven throughout. Our ability to love and create art, these may not be definitive clues as to why we are here but surely they define the parts of us that are truly amazing. Love is what makes this existence worth all of the horrid, all of the disgusting, all of the dissonance we inevitably experience.
Be it unrequited or all out passion, be it secret or shouted from every possible point imaginable, be it romantic and in the moment or an innate knowledge, I will maintain that love is the answer to any existential crisis.
Hello! I’m going to do a random post for you folks because my brain has been afire lately with things I’m still trying to sort out into coherent writing.
I thought this was a fun idea and have been having so many writing ideas lately (incomplete pieces of ideas, don’t get too excited for me) that I can’t seem to finish one single thing. I’ll get there though and at least I’m writing. You can’t force being awesome, it just comes naturally. (I swear, I really am modest, haha.)
So, without further adieu, I’ll take this lighter fare post and run with it. Maybe you’ll find we have some things in common or maybe you’ll finally go running in the other direction like I’ve always suspected you might. (I’m looking at all you non-communicative followers, haha.) It’s a risk I’m willing to take!
Five Things I’m Passionate About
-The pursuit of knowledge
-Reading & Writing! They go hand in hand, folks. “If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that.” –Stephen King (I’m fairly certain he knows what he’s talking about.)
-Science (Both fiction and real!) Want to watch Star Trek and contemplate an alternate universe?
-Anthropology and human history
Five Things I Would Like To Do Before I Die
-Write a novel or five
-Travel to Europe & Asia, maybe live in Europe for a time (Let’s take some historical tours!)
-Live to see space exploration become a primary, cooperative, continuously funded avenue for humans. Make it a priority!
-Find a Time Lord, travel with him/her, gloat to all my friends.
-Fall in love over and over again with life. Never stop appreciating the whole damn thing.
Five Things I Say A Lot
-Fuckity fuck and every variation I can muster
-I love Deep Space Nine
-I wish… or I hope… or I really love…
5 Books or Magazines I Have Read Lately
It’s been awhile since I actually finished a book, I read a lot but I keep starting new things, so I’ll shoot yah a few of my current reads and maybe a blog or two that I enjoy:
-The Stand by Stephen King (Disclaimer, do not read this book when you have a severe cold. It will freak you out and possibly give you nightmares helped along by medication. Also, don’t read it before bed every night. You know what, just don’t read Stephen King before bed at all.)
-Cosmos by Carl Sagan
-Fear and Loathing In Las Vegas by Hunter S. Thompson
-Matt’s blog (This is honestly my new favorite blog and I think you should definitely check it out.)
-Zodiac Unmasked: The Identity of America’s Most Elusive Serial Killer Revealed by Robert Graysmith
Five Favorite Movies
My choices are telling of how refined I am, prepare to be amazed. Thank goodness this didn’t ask top five favorites because that would be impossible. Here are some I revisit and/or reference frequently.
-The 5th Element
-Indiana Jones…really any of the original three, I can never pick a favorite
-Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back
-When Harry Met Sally
-Lord of The Rings: The Return of The King
I can’t believe how long it took me to complete this little thing. What do you think? Was it a waste of time? Do you plan on doing it? Do any of my answers surprise you? Am I asking you too many questions?
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